The MenaceWholived
by curiouskitty14
Summary: Voldemort Sommons a naruto who has taken over Kyuubi's role as a fire demon.Poor Voldemort Didn't know what he was getting into.No Pairings
1. Chapter One

******Disclaimer: I own Nothing **

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**Chapter 1**

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Naruto Uzumaki was a pretty likable guy funny, kind, easy going and an all around good person but for some reason fate seem to hate him. Life had never been easy for him orphaned since birth, hated by a whole village and cursed to house the most powerful demon in existence Kyuubi no Kitsune but he turned that all around he made friends gained the respect of the Village and used used the demons power to save everyone he loved and made his dream of being Hokage a reality and after a few years of happiness died happy as a hero.

Unfortunately for him fate wasn't finished with him, instead of joining his fallen friends and family in eternal rest he was forced to take on the Kyuubi's position. Turns out that the Kyuubi was a rouge fire demon that had wanted to take over the mortal shinobi world so instead of getting separated from the Kyuubi and getting his reward while the Kyuubi got its punishment he got Kyuubi's powers and got shackled with Kyuubi's job while the Kyuubi was on permanent vacation.

The job itself wasn't so bad, (who would complain about getting to control fire) it was the other demons he had to deal with that made him want to curse fate every chance he got , they were either uptight and frigid with no sense of humor or totally out of control he had yet to meet a demon who was in between. some days he felt like burning everyone of them until they were nothing but ashes floating in the wind unfortunately he didn't think it was possible.

fortunately for him today wasn't one of those days , today was one of the rare good days, the days where not a single demon could be seen in his vicinity, the days where nothing went wrong while he was doing his job, and most importantly the days where he could sit down in his human form for a nice bowl of ramen which was what he was doing right now. nothing could ruin this day.

Unfortunately for him he couldn't be more wrong because as he lifted his chop stick to taste the deliciousness that was ramen a bright light surrounded him and he disappeared to an unknown destination

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Deep in a forest stood several robed figures in a perfect circle. Drawn In the middle of the circle were many complicated runes. Among those figures a man with chalky white skin, red eyes and two slit like holes where his nose would be started to speak.

"Welcome my loyal servants, as you know I have discovered a way to get the perfect weapon that will ensure our victory in this war. In just minutes we shall have this weapon in the our possession."

At his announcement the other robed figures known as Death Eaters praised their master for his brilliant plan.

Their master known to the death eaters as the dark lord and known to others as you-know-who or voldemort raised one bony hand for silent and started to talk.

"let us begin"

At this the death eaters all pointed their wands to the middle of the circle and started chanting. Then as the chanting got louder the air got tenser and the runes started to glow and pretty soon the light coming off of the runes were so bright that many of the death eaters had to fight the instinct to close their eyes.

Soon the chanting stopped and Voldemort and his death eaters watched as the bright light faded to reveal a very pissed off blond haired and red eyed male.

Voldemort frown for the male looked nothing like the beast he was expecting instead the male looked like he was no more that 17.

"Who are you and where is the Kyuubi no kitsune?" hissed the dark lord

Naruto, who was very angry at his perfect day being ruined fought the urge to burn the snake like creature that was asking him questions. Naruto knew at the first glance of the hooded figures and the snake like man which he assumed was their leader that he had been summoned and by the looks of their wands he had probably been summoned by a group of wizards.

The last time he was summoned by wizards it was by a man named Grindwald and he had nearly killed the guy and as a result he had been suspended from his job which had left him in the demon realm and in the company of demons for a whole year. With that thought in mind Naruto took a deep breath and tried to stay calm. letting his eyes fade to blue he closed his eyes tried to decide on a plan. He could simply go back but they would probably just attempt to summon him again. he thought about scaring them but discarded that idea as well. He needed a plan that would ensure that they never tried to summon him again.

But before he could think of anything else the snake like creature interrupted his thoughts.

"I will ask you again who are you!"Voldemort hissed and pointed his wand at the boy, his death eaters were aslo doing the same thing.

At the sound of Voldermort's angry words and threatening gesture a plan stated to form in Naruto's mind. back when he was alive after he became Hogage no one would challenge him and those who did were overconfident idiots so to make his battles interesting he used to annoy the hell out of his opponents before he beat the crap out of them. All he had to do was annoy this guy to the point of no return.

Smiling pleasantly naruto answered the snake like creature.

"Hi, i'm Naruto Uzumaki the current Kyuubi no Kitsune."

Voldemort sneered in disgust and his death eaters stared at naruto in disbelief."You expect me to believe that a weakling like you is the great and powerful beast Kyuubi no Kitsune?"

Still smiling pleasantly Naruto released about half of his killing intent which sent all the creatures of the forest running and had the death eaters and even Voldemort freezing in fear.

Instead of showing his fear Voldemort smirked and looked naruto over taking in the black pants and orange shirt then taking in the youthful face and pleasant smile a plan started to form in his mind. "Your not exactly what I expected but if you can keep your current form I might still have some use for you."

Naruto felt his eye twitch but kept the pleasant smile on his face.'This guy is so gonna get it'

Holding out a bony hand to Naruto Voldemort gave the signal for his death eaters to activate their portkey.

Naruto took the bony hand and the portkey activated.


	2. Chapter Two

**Disclaimer: I own nothing**

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****Chapter 2

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Naruto let out a frustrated sign so far his plan at annoying Voldemort wasn't going the way he planned. The reason for this was the fact that he rarely saw the man. He had amused himself by pranking the death eaters (he loved watching them run around with their hair on fire) but that was getting boring.

Getting up from the bed he was laying in Naruto decide to go have some ramen in the kitchen( he 'convince' a few death eaters to buy some). Once he got there he went to the shelf where he usually kept his ramen only to find it empty. He stared blankly at the shelf after a moment it burst into around Naruto decided to find a death eater he could 'convince' to buy him more ramen.

After an hour of useless searching Naruto was frustrated, Hungry, and very very cranky. Giving up on finding any death eaters around Naruto decided to just go and buy his own ramen. He quickly found a fire place and took a handful of floo powder. Now came the hard part deciding where to go. The only two places he's heard about were Diagon Alley and Hogsmeade and since the death eaters had been talking about Hogsmeade a lot he decided to go there.

He stepped into the fire place

"Hogsmeade"

After a whirlpooling sensation Naruto was in random fire place. He looked around trying to figure out where he was but saw that the place was empty but he could hear a lot of shouts and screams outside. He stepped out of the empty place and stepped into chaos. People were running around and screaming as they were terrorized by masked death eaters.

'Huh so this is why they were talking about Hogsmeade'

Then a thought hit Naruto.' Voldemort is here' and what better way to annoy Voldemort then to embarrass him in front of hundreds of a people. With a smirk Naruto went to find Voldemort. After a while he caught sight of Voldemort talking(bragging) to a boy with messy dark hair and green eyes behind him were two people one with red hair and another with curly brown hair.

With a bright sunny grin Naruto ran toward Voldemort.

No one in Hogsmeade would forget what happened next.

**"Voldy-Chan!" **

this was said so loudly that everyone including the Death eaters stopped and stared at the boy the sound was coming from.

Voldemorts eyes widden in panic but before he could do or say anything he was tackled to the grown by Naruto who grabbed his robe color and started shaking him as he talked.

"Oh Voldy-chan I missed you so much I haven't seen you in forever! Where have you been Voldy-chan, I looked all around for you but I couldn't find you! Can you believe we ran out of ramen, I can't believe it either! I was-!"

**"Release me this instent!"**

Naruto stood up and waited for A very pissed off Voldemort to stand up. Once the dark lord was on his feat he gave Naruto A glare that would send most men running.

**"Please explain to me why your here"** hissed Voldemort in a deadly whisper. Naruto only smiled Brightly

"Why are you whispering Voldy-Chan and I just told you we ran out of ramen so i went to buy some!"

If looks could kill Naruto would be tortured killed revived then tortured and killed again. but before Voldemort could say anything Naruto turned around to face the Dark haired boy and his friends who were looking at him in shock. Naruto introduced himself brightly.

"I'm Naruto Uzumaki nice to meet you."

the boy looked stun for a moment then said. "I-Im Harry Potter"

"No way! your Harry Potter? Voldy-Chan complains about you all the time. Is it true that he couldn't even kill you when you were a baby!"

Harry looked warily at the blond the slowly nods his head.

"Wow that's pretty Pathetic Voldy-Chan!"

Voldemort opened his mouth to respond but is cut off by Naruto.

"I mean how can you call yourself a dark lord? You couldn't even kill a baby!"

Then Naruto heard several popping sounds he looked around and see's other people and robes appear and an old man appear right beside the sound of the popping noises the Death eaters activated their portkeys and disappeared leaving only voldemort.

"Hello Tom" the old man said.

"You know this old man Voldy-Chan?"

the old mans eyes widen at the name Naruto used.

**"This Isn't Over Potter." **Voldemort hissed then grabbed Narutos shoulders roughly.

But naruto would have none of it he ripped his shoulders away, moved a couple of steps back and pouted.

"No I don't want to go I haven't found my ramen yet."

**"Come Here Now!"**

"No if you don't let me stay I'll tell everyone about the hair growth potions and the potions you keep making your death eaters brew so that you could get it up again."

Everyone in Hogsmeade seemed to gasp at the same time then everyone broke down laughing some were even on rolling around on the laughing.

Needless to say Voldemort was not happy but being out numbered the only thing he could do was leave.

The next Day the Daily Prophet Had a new Obsession **"The Menace-Who-Lived!**"


	3. Chapter Three

**Disclaimer: I Own Nothing**

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**Chapter Three**

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"Are you still mad at me Voldy-chan? "Naruto ask while aiming his best puppy dog eyes at 'Voldy-chan'.

"**I demand you cease talking to me in that manner and show my name the proper respect it deserves!" **VoldemortHissed while attempting to once again Crucio the muggle family of three tied at his feet.

The father and husband simply sign in boredom while his wife signs in frustration as she tried to get her peacefully sleeping one year old daughter in a more comfortable sleeping position.

"But I am showing your name the proper respect it _deserves" _

Naruto responds while watching in amusement as Voldemort tried to get his crucio passed what used to be Kyuubi's Chakra. He watches as Voldemort once again gets frustrated at his failure and turns the Cruciatus on one of his followers adding to the growing pile of brain damaged dark wizards, well even more brain damage than before.

Voldemort opens his mouth to respond probably to deliver more empty threats, when the wife having had enough of sitting tied up on a dirty floor while her toddler sleeps in an uncomfortable position nudges her husband sharply and indicates, with a glare that promised **The Couch**, that he should say something.

The husband glances at his wife in fear then turns back to Voldemort. "Listen mate…" but stops when Voldemort glares at him , the man shies away in fear and looks across at his wife , his wife glares at him even more fiercely than before and feeling his self-preservation kick in the man promptly turns back to Voldemort and resume talking.

"Ok…listen you man…snake…thing…Whatever you are! We've had enough of this farce , we've been here for God knows how long , it's way pass Sophie's bed time , you've made me miss the best game of the whole frickin season and most importantly I've been threaten by **The Couch **do you even know how bad that place is? Oh who am I kidding of course you don't, I mean look at you…"

Everyone who had been watching and listening to the man's rant turn to look at Voldemort and nods in agreement, Voldemort was so shocked that a mere muggle would stand up to him that he didn't even punished them.

"he does have a point" responds Naruto as he listen to the man go off on a rant about his wife's threat to make him sleep on the couch all the while sounding like she had threaten to send him to that Azkaban prison that the death eaters he 'Played' with always begged him to send them back to.

Finally the man stops his rant, after a hard nudge from his wife of course, and looks expectantly at Voldemort who snaps out of his shock and glares at the man but instead of cowering in fear the man just glares back. Naruto watch them glare at each other for a while then gets bored and snaps his finger, as if knowing what was going to happen the man smirks in triumph and relief as he and his family disappears.

Voldemort hisses angrily at Naruto but Naruto ignores him and simply holds out his hands a death eater quickly steps forward with two hot bowls of Raman Noodles then quickly runs off when Naruto takes the bowl then another death eater quickly appears with two more bowls of Raman. After the fiftieth bowl or so Naruto signs in contentment, then turns to leave all of this took about fifteen seconds.

"And where do you think you're going?" hisses a still angry Voldemort

Naruto simply waves his hand dismissively "I'm just going back to Hogsmeade I'm going to try and find that candy shop again; I'm in the mood for some sweets."

Everyone's eyes widen in fear as they tried to imagine the blond high on sugar, but before they could say anything the blond disappears in a ball of flame. Everyone stays silent for a while until one brave (or stupid) death eater finally ask the question everyone was thinking

"My Lord, should we hide?"


End file.
